I know I haven't posted in a while, but it's been a crazy couple of months. I'm off my meds - yay!! It's been a rough journey and while I feel so much better, I still have some tough days. I've been supplementing with several natural supplements, first of which is Omega 3. Based on studies they know that Omega 3 is important to brain function. I've also been taking Vitamin D. I was extremely deficient and for some reason have a hard time getting my levels up, so I'll probably have to supplement for a while with this one. The supplement that really helps me get through anxious days is Niacin. Niacin promotes tryptophan production by the body, and tryptophan is helpful with relaxation (remember Turkey at Thanksgiving?), so it's been my lifesaver. I also take Kava Kava as needed for anxiety. Kind of have to watch this one, because you can build up a tolerance to it.
All in all, I feel pretty good. I have a lot going on in my life right now, so it's inevitable that I have some hard days. I enrolled in a program at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition, which is amazing. With my desire to help educate people on the importance of good nutrition (and lack thereof in our current food supply), I felt the program was right up my alley, so to speak. It will take a year to complete, but once I'm finished I will be a certified Holistic Health and Wellness Counselor.
Speaking of, I'll need to keep this short. Lots of homework to do. =)
In the meantime, check out this article about how pesticides are linked to ADHD here.
~ Namaste
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Sunday, April 11, 2010
The Half Way Point
So I'm at the half way point on the withdraw of my meds. It's been a rough week. I'm having really bad withdraw symptoms and am just trying to keep it together. The scariest part is it could take months to get back to "normal." I upped my Omega 3 supplement to over 8 grams per day. It's a lot, but it's helping a lot with the rage episodes I experience. I still feel as if I'm crawling out of my skin. You know that feeling you get when you've had WAY, WAY, WAY too much caffeine?! That's how I feel. Ugh!
I'm going to try to start running again tomorrow. I think that might help. I hope so anyway. I just know that I have to start doing something else to take my mind of the withdraw. Never thought psych drugs (or lack thereof) could make you feel like a total tweeker, but they can.
Have to go study now...
I'm going to try to start running again tomorrow. I think that might help. I hope so anyway. I just know that I have to start doing something else to take my mind of the withdraw. Never thought psych drugs (or lack thereof) could make you feel like a total tweeker, but they can.
Have to go study now...
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Week 2 On The Supplements
Wow! So far so good. I love the supplements. They are totally helping with my mood. Motivation not so much, but my mood yes!
So I get my bonus money in a week and I plan on buying a treadmill. I can't wait!! The worst part about going to the gym is that to some extent I worry about what I look like. I know that shouldn't be the case, but it is. I'm trying to grow my crazy short hair out and because it is short, it's a disaster in the mornings. Seriously, one side will look fine and the other is sticking out everywhere. Can you say scary?! Not too mention the sweat factor. Come on girls, you all know what I'm talking about. It is not sexy to have sweat marks around your ass cheeks, boobs, belly, etc. So, I'm a little vain, but who isn't?!
Even more important than meeting my vane obsessions is the cost of the gym. It's $65 a month and the treadmill will pay for itself about a year. I need to cut down on my monthly expenses and this is a great way to do just that!
The treadmill that I want is so cool. I'm having a hard time decided between two of them, but am leaning towards this one. Check it out here.
Anyway, I digress... I meet with my doc on Tuesday to go over the titration schedule and get my final script for my meds. It will be a great feeling to no longer have to worry about taking a physically addictive drug anymore. Less money spent on prescriptions and doctors visit (and the gym) is more money that I can spend on other things.
Well, I'm going to keep this short. Have stuff to do around the house. Have a great week everyone.
~ Namaste ~
So I get my bonus money in a week and I plan on buying a treadmill. I can't wait!! The worst part about going to the gym is that to some extent I worry about what I look like. I know that shouldn't be the case, but it is. I'm trying to grow my crazy short hair out and because it is short, it's a disaster in the mornings. Seriously, one side will look fine and the other is sticking out everywhere. Can you say scary?! Not too mention the sweat factor. Come on girls, you all know what I'm talking about. It is not sexy to have sweat marks around your ass cheeks, boobs, belly, etc. So, I'm a little vain, but who isn't?!
Even more important than meeting my vane obsessions is the cost of the gym. It's $65 a month and the treadmill will pay for itself about a year. I need to cut down on my monthly expenses and this is a great way to do just that!
The treadmill that I want is so cool. I'm having a hard time decided between two of them, but am leaning towards this one. Check it out here.
Anyway, I digress... I meet with my doc on Tuesday to go over the titration schedule and get my final script for my meds. It will be a great feeling to no longer have to worry about taking a physically addictive drug anymore. Less money spent on prescriptions and doctors visit (and the gym) is more money that I can spend on other things.
Well, I'm going to keep this short. Have stuff to do around the house. Have a great week everyone.
~ Namaste ~
Monday, February 15, 2010
My First Post Since the Race
Wow, it's been a while! I'm having a difficult time writing this because I haven't run or worked out since Dec. 19th and am feeling a little like a failure. I've been going through a slight bout with depression. I think it's a result of all the health issues I had last year. It's just snowballed despite finally finding and correcting the health problem I was suffering from.
I never have had an addictive personality, but after my surgery I found myself chasing the pain with Percocet. Boy, did I like that drug. I felt so good on it, but I got to the point where I was taking one every hour or two, not the four to six hour period that the dosing instructions recommend. Once I realized what I was doing, I stopped taking it but had a few days of withdraw that sucked. Lots of anxiety, which I hate and have a hard time dealing with. I took Adivan the first few days to sleep and then stopped that and stuck to Benadryl.
So I'm over all that but in the midst of all the drugs, I think I have messed up my antidepressant. I've been so sensitive and agitated lately. On the one hand it's been good, because it has given me an opportunity to reevaluate the people I call friends. People that, I'm not sure why, keep me on a string for those times when no one else is around for them. I've come to the conclusion that some people in my life are truly just Facebook friends. On the other hand, it's easier when the meds are working and I don't care and am not sensitive to what other people think, do, or say.
The God's honest truth is that I don't want to be a slave to the medication anymore. I want to be mentally healthy through diet and exercise. I don't want to worry about picking up my script before I run out or the sober blackouts I experience weekly. I don't want to have to worry about Cymbalta withdraw.
Withdraw from Cymbalta is horrible. I experienced the withdraw a few years ago. I had itchy skin, extreme anxiety, brain zaps, no concentration, sober blackouts, and depression and that was just in the first five days. Because of the effect of Cymbalta on the nervous system it can take months and months to withdraw from the drug. Percocet withdraw is a cakewalk compared to Cymbalta.
I had read about a antidepressant withdraw program on the internet, but when I called I didn't feel very comfortable with the staff I spoke with. Through a blog I found out about another program called Point of Return (POR). It is a non-profit that is run by doctors and volunteers. The staff is available by phone or email and there is a private forum for only those that are enrolled in the program.
You start the program by ordering their natural supplements, patient and physician instructions, and the journal. Everything comes as a package based on the psychiatric dependency. Once you receive the package and have reviewed the instructions you start the supplements for 10 - 14 days. During that period you meet with your physician and give him/her the physician instructions. The physician will then prescribed a titrating dose. The dose may need to be formulated by a compounding pharmacy. That is the point where you start the titration.
OK, OK I'm going on and on and that's just me being scared. It's a scary prospect getting off a drug that I have been taking and dependent on for so long. Part of why I'm writing this is because I plan on keeping my blog updated with my progress over the next few months. I will also post some important information that I think you should all know about the poisons in our food that the FDA doesn't want you to know about. Here's the first one about Aspartame...
Part of my program is exercise, which I want to start again tomorrow. (I'll start tracking my mileage again through my Nike Mini-Me on the front page of my blog.) I haven't been totally sedentary, I've been walking my dogs daily, but I haven't been kicking it at the gym like I was for five months. My hope is the integration of good food, exercise and the POR program will help me to get back to a mentally and physically healthy me!
Well, hope you can keep up with my blog as I go through this transition. Thanks in advance for you prayers, encouragement and support.
~ Namaste
I never have had an addictive personality, but after my surgery I found myself chasing the pain with Percocet. Boy, did I like that drug. I felt so good on it, but I got to the point where I was taking one every hour or two, not the four to six hour period that the dosing instructions recommend. Once I realized what I was doing, I stopped taking it but had a few days of withdraw that sucked. Lots of anxiety, which I hate and have a hard time dealing with. I took Adivan the first few days to sleep and then stopped that and stuck to Benadryl.
So I'm over all that but in the midst of all the drugs, I think I have messed up my antidepressant. I've been so sensitive and agitated lately. On the one hand it's been good, because it has given me an opportunity to reevaluate the people I call friends. People that, I'm not sure why, keep me on a string for those times when no one else is around for them. I've come to the conclusion that some people in my life are truly just Facebook friends. On the other hand, it's easier when the meds are working and I don't care and am not sensitive to what other people think, do, or say.
The God's honest truth is that I don't want to be a slave to the medication anymore. I want to be mentally healthy through diet and exercise. I don't want to worry about picking up my script before I run out or the sober blackouts I experience weekly. I don't want to have to worry about Cymbalta withdraw.
Withdraw from Cymbalta is horrible. I experienced the withdraw a few years ago. I had itchy skin, extreme anxiety, brain zaps, no concentration, sober blackouts, and depression and that was just in the first five days. Because of the effect of Cymbalta on the nervous system it can take months and months to withdraw from the drug. Percocet withdraw is a cakewalk compared to Cymbalta.
I had read about a antidepressant withdraw program on the internet, but when I called I didn't feel very comfortable with the staff I spoke with. Through a blog I found out about another program called Point of Return (POR). It is a non-profit that is run by doctors and volunteers. The staff is available by phone or email and there is a private forum for only those that are enrolled in the program.
You start the program by ordering their natural supplements, patient and physician instructions, and the journal. Everything comes as a package based on the psychiatric dependency. Once you receive the package and have reviewed the instructions you start the supplements for 10 - 14 days. During that period you meet with your physician and give him/her the physician instructions. The physician will then prescribed a titrating dose. The dose may need to be formulated by a compounding pharmacy. That is the point where you start the titration.
OK, OK I'm going on and on and that's just me being scared. It's a scary prospect getting off a drug that I have been taking and dependent on for so long. Part of why I'm writing this is because I plan on keeping my blog updated with my progress over the next few months. I will also post some important information that I think you should all know about the poisons in our food that the FDA doesn't want you to know about. Here's the first one about Aspartame...
Part of my program is exercise, which I want to start again tomorrow. (I'll start tracking my mileage again through my Nike Mini-Me on the front page of my blog.) I haven't been totally sedentary, I've been walking my dogs daily, but I haven't been kicking it at the gym like I was for five months. My hope is the integration of good food, exercise and the POR program will help me to get back to a mentally and physically healthy me!
Well, hope you can keep up with my blog as I go through this transition. Thanks in advance for you prayers, encouragement and support.
~ Namaste
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Training/Fundraising Update - Finale
Well, I did it...we all did it. We finished the race and it was one of the most amazing experiences I've ever had. As hard as the fund raising was and getting up 4 days a week at 5:00 to go to the gym/practice it was SO worth it! Thanks to my coaches, mentors, teammates, supporters and Michael for all your help and encouragement. Here's how the weekend went...
We got into Vegas around 8:30 a.m. on Saturday, the day before the race. We checked in and then headed to the Expo. The Expo had some great vendors, Team Challenge, CytoMax, Cascade Farms, Nurti Life, Kinesio, and so many more. We had a great time collecting our gear and freebies and afterwards headed back to the hotel to chill. My great friend Nathan stopped by to visit. He had come in town from Vegas to cheer on me and a few other friends! Nathan, if your reading this, you are an awesome friend!! Thanks for being there!
Saturday night was the CCFA Pasta Party. There were over 900 participants from CCFA at the party. It was cool seeing all the Team Challenge shirts at the party and at the MGM where we were all staying. We ate a delicious dinner and listened to our guest speakers while we froze our butts off in the conference center. Little did we know that the party was just a warm up or should I say cool down for what was coming the next morning. The best part of the dinner was hearing that nationwide Team Challenge had raised $3.5 million for the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation. What a win and we hadn't even started the race yet!
Sunday morning came early. We were due to meet our team in the lobby at 5:00 a.m. As we rounded the corner to the lobby all you could see was a sea of orange singlets. Nine hundred Team Challenge participants gathered in the lobby waiting to head out to the starting line and their assigned corrals. The temperature outside was a smokin' 34 degrees. We were in for a chilly start. We layered on as many dri-fit shirts, jackets, and beanies as we had and headed to the starting line.
By the time we reached the start we had probably walked 5 miles over the last 24 hours. If only we could deduct that from the 13.1 we were about to tackle. The walk to the gear check was another mile and the way back was a traffic jam of spectators and other participants trying to get to their corrals. I had to cut through the closer corrals to get to mine or else I would miss my group. Another mile down! Unbelievably, I was able to find my teammates in the sea of participants. Almost forgot to tell you that there were 17,000 participants for the 1/2 marathon and another 11,000 for the full. Not even a boat-load, but rather an ark-load of people!
So my TC friends and I joked, danced, and goofed around until we reached the starting line. It was seriously colder than a polar bears ass and goofing around was the only thing keeping us warm. What was I thinking leaving my gloves at the gear check??!! The start came and went and we were on the road. It was a long 13.1 miles peppered by running Elvis, bands, brides and grooms to be, and a whole lot of Team Challenge supporters cheering us on. We even had the pleasure of watching a drunk guy wander out on the race course only to end up being put in handcuffs and escorted to a police car.
About mile 7 my teammate and favorite party girl Amanda started having some knee problem. Call me selfish, but there was no way I was going to let her quit. We stretched out and kept moving. By mile 9 there was no turning back. We'd stop to stretch and then back on the course. I figured why stop now! Four more miles to go. Piece of cake. The supporters cheering us on totally helped push us along. At mile 13 we ran into our coach Meegan. What a site for sore eyes, quads, hamstrings, you name it!
At the turn into Mandalay Bay we had about 2 tenths of a mile left. It was not long after that I saw Nate waiting near the finish line. My final boost of encouragement! Then we saw it - the finish!! We had done it. We had just completed a 13.1 mile race. What an amazing acheivement!
I headed to the gear check, picked up my gear and met up with Amanda and Nate. We walked over to the Team Challenge team tent for some food and drink from P.F. Changs. Afterwards we headed back to the hotel to rest. We had a big night ahead of us.
Our night out consisted of dinner at Sushi Samba and partying at Lavo in the Venetian. I can always count on Nate to show me a good time! Lavo was a blast. The marathoner's from San Diego met us out and we partied and danced 'til late. About $1,000 later (thank God for the comps Nate's friend hooked us up with) we decided we had better head back to the hotel for some shut eye.
Why is check out at 11:00 a.m.? In Vegas no less? Seriously, why?!! I dragged my ass out of bed, threw my stuff in my suitcase and headed for the lobby. After meeting up with some of our teammates, Amanda and I decided to do the CSI Experience. It was cheesy, but kind of cool. After CSI we stopped for a bite to eat and then off to the airport.
That was it. The weekend that I thought would never come had come and went. It was bitter sweet. Happy that I completed the race and had such an awesome weekend. Sad that I wouldn't see my teammates at practice each Saturday morning. I know that we'll keep in touch, but I'll definitely miss the comradarie that we had going out each Saturday morning at sunrise.
Thanks to my readers for keeping up with my adventures. I hope you've enjoyed my updates and pictures. I'd like to keep up the blog with my excercise and weight loss challenges. I'm trying not to think of it as an Biggest Loser type adventure, but more like the Biggest Winner opportunity. Feel free to keep up with my new posts. Hopefully, I can be an inspiration.
Thanks again for all your support. May all of you have a blessed Christmas and an amazing New Year!
We got into Vegas around 8:30 a.m. on Saturday, the day before the race. We checked in and then headed to the Expo. The Expo had some great vendors, Team Challenge, CytoMax, Cascade Farms, Nurti Life, Kinesio, and so many more. We had a great time collecting our gear and freebies and afterwards headed back to the hotel to chill. My great friend Nathan stopped by to visit. He had come in town from Vegas to cheer on me and a few other friends! Nathan, if your reading this, you are an awesome friend!! Thanks for being there!
Saturday night was the CCFA Pasta Party. There were over 900 participants from CCFA at the party. It was cool seeing all the Team Challenge shirts at the party and at the MGM where we were all staying. We ate a delicious dinner and listened to our guest speakers while we froze our butts off in the conference center. Little did we know that the party was just a warm up or should I say cool down for what was coming the next morning. The best part of the dinner was hearing that nationwide Team Challenge had raised $3.5 million for the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation. What a win and we hadn't even started the race yet!
Sunday morning came early. We were due to meet our team in the lobby at 5:00 a.m. As we rounded the corner to the lobby all you could see was a sea of orange singlets. Nine hundred Team Challenge participants gathered in the lobby waiting to head out to the starting line and their assigned corrals. The temperature outside was a smokin' 34 degrees. We were in for a chilly start. We layered on as many dri-fit shirts, jackets, and beanies as we had and headed to the starting line.
By the time we reached the start we had probably walked 5 miles over the last 24 hours. If only we could deduct that from the 13.1 we were about to tackle. The walk to the gear check was another mile and the way back was a traffic jam of spectators and other participants trying to get to their corrals. I had to cut through the closer corrals to get to mine or else I would miss my group. Another mile down! Unbelievably, I was able to find my teammates in the sea of participants. Almost forgot to tell you that there were 17,000 participants for the 1/2 marathon and another 11,000 for the full. Not even a boat-load, but rather an ark-load of people!
So my TC friends and I joked, danced, and goofed around until we reached the starting line. It was seriously colder than a polar bears ass and goofing around was the only thing keeping us warm. What was I thinking leaving my gloves at the gear check??!! The start came and went and we were on the road. It was a long 13.1 miles peppered by running Elvis, bands, brides and grooms to be, and a whole lot of Team Challenge supporters cheering us on. We even had the pleasure of watching a drunk guy wander out on the race course only to end up being put in handcuffs and escorted to a police car.
About mile 7 my teammate and favorite party girl Amanda started having some knee problem. Call me selfish, but there was no way I was going to let her quit. We stretched out and kept moving. By mile 9 there was no turning back. We'd stop to stretch and then back on the course. I figured why stop now! Four more miles to go. Piece of cake. The supporters cheering us on totally helped push us along. At mile 13 we ran into our coach Meegan. What a site for sore eyes, quads, hamstrings, you name it!
At the turn into Mandalay Bay we had about 2 tenths of a mile left. It was not long after that I saw Nate waiting near the finish line. My final boost of encouragement! Then we saw it - the finish!! We had done it. We had just completed a 13.1 mile race. What an amazing acheivement!
I headed to the gear check, picked up my gear and met up with Amanda and Nate. We walked over to the Team Challenge team tent for some food and drink from P.F. Changs. Afterwards we headed back to the hotel to rest. We had a big night ahead of us.
Our night out consisted of dinner at Sushi Samba and partying at Lavo in the Venetian. I can always count on Nate to show me a good time! Lavo was a blast. The marathoner's from San Diego met us out and we partied and danced 'til late. About $1,000 later (thank God for the comps Nate's friend hooked us up with) we decided we had better head back to the hotel for some shut eye.
Why is check out at 11:00 a.m.? In Vegas no less? Seriously, why?!! I dragged my ass out of bed, threw my stuff in my suitcase and headed for the lobby. After meeting up with some of our teammates, Amanda and I decided to do the CSI Experience. It was cheesy, but kind of cool. After CSI we stopped for a bite to eat and then off to the airport.
That was it. The weekend that I thought would never come had come and went. It was bitter sweet. Happy that I completed the race and had such an awesome weekend. Sad that I wouldn't see my teammates at practice each Saturday morning. I know that we'll keep in touch, but I'll definitely miss the comradarie that we had going out each Saturday morning at sunrise.
Thanks to my readers for keeping up with my adventures. I hope you've enjoyed my updates and pictures. I'd like to keep up the blog with my excercise and weight loss challenges. I'm trying not to think of it as an Biggest Loser type adventure, but more like the Biggest Winner opportunity. Feel free to keep up with my new posts. Hopefully, I can be an inspiration.
Thanks again for all your support. May all of you have a blessed Christmas and an amazing New Year!
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Training/Fundraising Update - Part VII
Hi all! I know it's been a while, but it's been a busy couple of weeks. I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving. I had an awesome one. Nothing like cooking at home in your p.j.'s and watching movies with your son all day. It was so relaxing!
I have two pieces of good, no actually great news!! First, thanks to Prudential Matching Gifts I made my fund raising goal. I'm so happy and a big thanks to all of you that were able to donate and have been so supportive of my run!
The second piece of good news is that my recent colonoscopy came back clear. That's right, no inflammation! The probiotic did the trick. I'm still having some pain, but I'm working with a naturopath to see if we can nip that issue in the bud too.
So the race is three days away. I can't believe that Sunday I will be standing at the starting line with professional and casual runners alike. How about the fact that we are running down the Vegas strip?! I'm SO excited!!
Well, I have to sign off for now - lots to do. I promise I will update my blog with all the info from the race when I get back on Monday. Until then, have a great weekend and thanks again for all your support!!
I have two pieces of good, no actually great news!! First, thanks to Prudential Matching Gifts I made my fund raising goal. I'm so happy and a big thanks to all of you that were able to donate and have been so supportive of my run!
The second piece of good news is that my recent colonoscopy came back clear. That's right, no inflammation! The probiotic did the trick. I'm still having some pain, but I'm working with a naturopath to see if we can nip that issue in the bud too.
So the race is three days away. I can't believe that Sunday I will be standing at the starting line with professional and casual runners alike. How about the fact that we are running down the Vegas strip?! I'm SO excited!!
Well, I have to sign off for now - lots to do. I promise I will update my blog with all the info from the race when I get back on Monday. Until then, have a great weekend and thanks again for all your support!!
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Training/Fundraising Update - Part VII
What a long week! The worst thing about having Crohn's is one day you feel fine and then the next not so much.
Over the last week I've dealt with more pain than I've experienced in the past. It's sharp stabbing pain that comes and goes. I've really had to watch what I eat and drink this week since some things seem to make it worse. For example, I have suddenly developed lactose intolerance. The worst part is I have been SO tired. Most nights I've gone to bed between 8 and 9 and not woken up until 6. Also, I missed one training session and had to cut another one short, which was really hard for me to accept. I make every effort not to miss training or practice.
So, I think I'm going to call my doctor. I've been thinking about it for the last several weeks, I just have been putting it off. I'm trying to avoid having to take any kind of medication or having more tests, but I may just have to suck it up and deal.
OK, so the good news is that I finished the Phoenix New Times 10K today. It was a tough haul and at one point I seriously thought about cutting it short, but I didn't. I pushed through despite nausea and pain the last three miles.
I know, I know!! Enough whining already! Here's a few pics from the event.
I'm staying positive that this next week will be better. I'm excited to participate in the Aflac Iron Girl 3K next Sunday. My hope is that I'll do better in that race.
Well, ciao for now friends. Have a great week!
Over the last week I've dealt with more pain than I've experienced in the past. It's sharp stabbing pain that comes and goes. I've really had to watch what I eat and drink this week since some things seem to make it worse. For example, I have suddenly developed lactose intolerance. The worst part is I have been SO tired. Most nights I've gone to bed between 8 and 9 and not woken up until 6. Also, I missed one training session and had to cut another one short, which was really hard for me to accept. I make every effort not to miss training or practice.
So, I think I'm going to call my doctor. I've been thinking about it for the last several weeks, I just have been putting it off. I'm trying to avoid having to take any kind of medication or having more tests, but I may just have to suck it up and deal.
OK, so the good news is that I finished the Phoenix New Times 10K today. It was a tough haul and at one point I seriously thought about cutting it short, but I didn't. I pushed through despite nausea and pain the last three miles.
I know, I know!! Enough whining already! Here's a few pics from the event.
I'm staying positive that this next week will be better. I'm excited to participate in the Aflac Iron Girl 3K next Sunday. My hope is that I'll do better in that race.
Well, ciao for now friends. Have a great week!
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